#33 RULE OF ME-LOVE

Be okay with not being okay

I believe that people are getting further and further out of touch with their emotions. We are taught at a young age to ignore our feelings, to push them aside, or to hide them. Young men are asked to toughen up and suck it up. Women are accused of being over emotional and irrational. 

You are human.
Sometimes you're going to feel lonely. 
Ugly. 
Hard done by.
Worthless. 
Lost.
Exhausted.
You name it.

I challenge you to allow yourself to feel how and what you are feeling. Give yourself permission to be okay with not being okay for a while. Work through some of those emotions rather than sweeping them away. Maybe writing will help, talking to a friend, meditating or maybe you need a good ol' ugly cry fest.

Maybe if we stop denying our feelings and face them, we will rely less on unhealthy distractions and vices we may use.

It's okay. Trust me.

#32 RULE OF ME-LOVE

Figure out exactly what it is that is good for your soul

A couple of months ago I found myself waking up on a houseboat in one of the most beautiful places in the world, Shuswap, British Columbia. I would read, make some deliciously healthy and simple food, listen to country and classic rock, have naps, soak in the hot tub, sit by the campfire, gaze at the stars. 

Afterwards, I was talking to a friend and I mentioned how great my vacation was, that I felt refreshed and it must have been good for my soul. He wasn't an outdoorsy kind of person so I asked him, well what would be good for your soul then?

He told me: That is a really good fucking question. I hadn't really thought about it. I'll have to get back to you on that one.

About a week later, I got a text from him. He said "To answer your question. Slowing down. And finding somebody to share my life with.

So ask yourself.. What would be good for my soul? It is a really good fucking question.

#31 RULE OF ME-LOVE

Believe the compliments you receive

It is human nature to dwell on criticism and forget or question the praise that we receive. Try to pay attention to the nice things people are saying about you or have said about you in the past. If possible WRITE THEM DOWN. Because sometimes, when you find yourself losing faith in yourself, the best way to boost your confidence is to recall how highly you are regarded by someone else. Strive to hold yourself in the highest regard. See yourself as your admirers see you. 

I recently came across some notes about nice things people had said to me or about me. It sure made me feel good and I only wished I had written down more. Here are some of the things I had written down:

* I see someone that's so considerate and full of joy
* You are pretty, and you can be as confident as you want
* You are one of the few people I know that deserves someone amazing
* Tori, I like your voice (from a 3 year old that I used to baby-sit - how adorable is that?!)

[ There is a lovely little book called Look Who Believes in You by Tanya Harmon that would make a great gift to yourself or a friend. ]